The Advantages and Disadvantages of YES Parenting and Authoritative Parenting
As parents, we are trained to refuse when we believe that correcting our children is necessary. When kids occasionally want to skip school or stay up late watching television. However, this frequently prompts us to question if we are treating them unfairly or exercising too much authority. According to some psychologists, telling your child “no” when they ask for something might limit their development and cause them to question their adult judgment. This idea has given rise to a new parenting approach where parents attempt to restrict the use of the word “NO” and give in to the majority of requests made by their children unless there is a very compelling reason not to. It goes under the name “Yes Parenting.”
What Is YES Parenting?
Yes, parenting gives kids the freedom to do anything they want, whether that’s using crayons to draw on walls or eating chocolate for breakfast. This parenting approach does not need you to be a doormat and allow your children to treat you any way they like. Setting up good boundaries and preventing yourself from saying no when it is unnecessary are more important.
The thought that parents frequently tell their children no, even when it is not necessary, gave rise to the idea of yes parenting. According to studies, a one-year-old child is exposed to no 400 times every day, which is way too many. This prevents children from having the chance to learn more about their surroundings and push themselves to the utmost.
Parents are urged to say “yes” more often and let their children see the world. If they make a demand that is unreasonable, change the wording such that no word of rejection is necessary. But like any other parenting approach, there are advantages and disadvantages to this one, too.
Pros Of YES Parenting:
According to experts, adopting a yes parenting approach has several advantages. Future achievement for children may be increased, and it may also strengthen the bond between children and their parents. Thanks to this, kids may now live their lives to the fullest without having to worry about falling. Here are some benefits of using this parenting approach:
- Increases The Link Between Parents And Children:The likelihood that your child may try to hide something from you diminishes when you give in to their request. You won’t need to spy on them in order to find out what they are doing.
- Makes The Child More Confident:Increases a child’s self-confidence by giving them the freedom to accomplish everything they desire, even if you know they could fail at it.
- Makes Them More Creative:Children who have parents who support them in all they do are more creative, have a greater understanding of the world, and are more willing to try new things.
- Helps The Child Accept No More Readily:When children’s demands are consistently satisfied, they are more receptive to hearing “no.”
- There Are Less Tantrums And Fits:Children are more likely to have less tantrums.
Cons Of YES Parenting:
Parenting is indeed about establishing sound boundaries and effectively correcting children. It is important for your children to follow their ambitions without hurting other people. It is critical for parents to understand where to draw the line and when to say “no” to their child’s demands.
- Failure To Establish Boundaries:When parents do not stop their children from engaging in behavior that is unacceptable, children do not understand the limitations placed on them by others.
- Kids Are More Self-Centered:Kids who experience this become egocentric and begin to think that their lives are based on them. There is a danger they will underestimate the needs and sentiments of others.
- Parents Get Exhausted:Parents are emotionally and physically exhausted from having to meet the extraordinary demands of their children.
There is no one parenting style that works for all children when it comes to parents. Every child is unique, and they require individualized parenting. It would be best if you experimented to see what is effective and ineffective for your child.
What Is Authoritative Parenting?
Parents who are considered authoritative somehow manage to achieve the ideal balance between being strict and being a pushover. They are warm and kind with their children, but they also establish firm boundaries. They parent with the intention of raising well-rounded, autonomous, content individuals who will contribute positively to society. They value their children’s personhood and uniqueness.
When compared to permissive parents who prefer to avoid rules entirely and authoritarian parents who are too focused on regulations, authoritative parents utilize rules to help their kids make the correct decisions.
However, they are not as rigorous as authoritarian parents, according to Jeff Nalin, a licensed clinical psychologist and the founder of Paradigm Treatment Centres. “They acknowledge the importance of setting limits and boundaries but are not as strict as authoritarian parents,” he adds. “They don’t give their kids too many rules or unreasonable expectations; instead, they encourage their kids to express themselves and participate in problem-solving.”
Traits Of Authoritative Parents:
Some typical attributes of this parenting technique include:
- Let their children to fail, but offer support as well as guidance if requested
- Put Emphasis on well-roundedness in their kids
- Offer their kids the chance to discuss family rules daily
- Set a high precedence on righteousness and regard
- Prefer to trust their children rather than terrorize or befriend them
Pros Of Authoritative Parenting:
- Accountability: Children who are reared by parents who are in charge realize that their decisions eventually affect them, which gives them the ability to make wise choices. Typically, these kids resist peer pressure. Additionally, they have acquired the essential life skills necessary for success.
- Respect: Children are more inclined to appreciate others if their parents treat them with respect by giving them certain freedoms. They frequently do well in social situations and get along well with professors and other students. Even if you don’t agree with or grant their requests, taking into account and acknowledging your child’s sentiments demonstrates to them how much you cherish and respect them. This method also serves as an example of how to respect and value others.
- Resiliency: Parents who are in charge of their children enable them to make errors and grow from them. They foster resilience, which is the capacity to withstand setbacks and recover from adversity in life. These encounters also boost confidence, pride in accomplishments, problem-solving abilities, and self-worth.
- Leadership: These kids are capable of making their own judgements, which gives them the self-assurance and know-how needed to assume leadership responsibilities. Although they respect the ideas and viewpoints of others, they are also at ease taking the initiative and making difficult decisions.
- Studious: Parents who have authority provide for their kids. They make themselves available and give all the resources required for their children’s academic achievement, whether it is weekly homework or a unique project. But they aren’t going to do it for them. Kids, therefore, form strong study habits and take satisfaction in doing their assignments alone, but they also have a career they can turn to if they need direction or assistance.
Cons Of Authoritative Parenting:
There aren’t many negatives to authoritative parenting because it is the kind of parenting that psychologists throughout the world most frequently recommend. The ideal answer to an issue is sometimes found by striking a compromise between two options, and that is definitely the case in this instance. However, it doesn’t follow that as long as you use authoritative parenting techniques, everything will be easy.
Kids go through typical periods of disobedience, rage, and indifference as they mature. For authoritarian parents who have worked hard to raise their children in the best way possible and who inherently have high standards for them, these times may be very challenging. According to famous psychologist Nalin, the solution to this problem is patience.
Because it calls for a careful balancing act between punishment and freedom, authoritative parenting can definitely be more challenging and time-consuming to achieve. Before figuring out the tactics that work best for them and their kids, parents may go through a few phases of trial and error. It’s critical to understand that rebellion is a normal aspect of growing up. He advises parents to maintain their firmness and spell out the repercussions of misbehavior.
While there is not a single best way to raise a child, experts concur that for the majority of children and families, an authoritative approach works best. With a compassionate, perceptive viewpoint that considers children’s feelings, this parenting approach strikes a balance between expectations and constraints.